What Are YOU Afraid Of?
Do you have a fear of public
speaking? of meeting with prospects? of your boss? Do you have a fear of
failure or if risk? Many of these are common fears
that people face every day. What can you do about them. and how can you
get past them and move forward despite them?
Let me show you how 3 simply steps to overcome fear in any
situation with ease.
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It's
important to remember that the emotion of fear, in and of itself, is not a bad
thing. Fear is just as necessary an emotion as the emotion of love, or
joy or self-confidence.
Fear's
function is to keep us safe. It will cause us to run away from danger or will
keep us from doing something stupid like jumping in the water if you can't
swim.
Yet
while fear has it's place, we CAN allow it to run our life and keep us from
trying anything new.
Tony
Robins said that one of the best ways of combating fear is to use fear against
itself. In other words, become more fearful of the consequences of fear
rather than the thing we fear. For example, what will you miss out on if we
won't fly on an airplane? Who will you miss the opportunity to see?
What exciting experiences will you miss out on and what lasting memories
will you never create because you were too afraid to fly?
Fearing
THESE consequences MORE than the fear of flying will help you get past this
debilitating fear.
Fear
is really a matter of your own mental focus. Think about it; when you are
fearful of something, what you are focusing on?
You
are merely thinking of all the things that COULD go wrong. They haven't
gone wrong yet - and there's a good chance they won't! You just imagine that they MIGHT go wrong.
For
example, if you are fearful of speaking in front of others, your thoughts might
be something like this: "Oh no, I'd probably going to embarrass
myself in front of everyone!" "I think I would just sound
stupid!" and so on.
And
so you become nervous, fearful and you
will allow that imagined
fearful situation to keep you from growing and experiencing something
new.
What
is the opposite of fear? CONFIDENCE! COURAGE! So when you are
confident, where is your focus? What would you be saying to yourself?
Your thoughts would be different, wouldn't they!
In
this scenario, you would be focused on how excited you are to give this
presentation. You are already thinking about how much people will like it
and how they will benefit from it.
Your
body language will be different too! When you are fearful, you tend to be
more timid in your movements. Your voice is not as strong, you lack eye
contact, etc.
On the
other hand, when you are confident, your shoulders are back, your head is
up, your stride is intentional, your voice is strong, and you have eye contact
with people along with a pleasant smile.
So -
since fear is really nothing more than an emotion and is based on the focus of
your own thoughts, you can combat fear with an intentionally different focus
and stronger thoughts.
You can also squash fear with
your deliberate body movements and posture. This means you have more
control over fear than you may ever have imagined!
Just
ACTING AS IF YOU HAVE COURAGE GIVES YOU MORE COURAGE! Conducting yourself as
if you were confident
gives you more confidence!
So -
there you have it. You can easily control fear by
1.
Using fear against itself and fearing the consequences of succumbing to
fear.
2. Focusing on what will go
RIGHT rather than what could possibly go WRONG ... and by
3.
Deliberately using your body posture, your voice, your eye contact, and
gestures in a way that will build your confidence.
Vincent
Van Gogh said: If you hear
a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that
voice will be silenced (forever).”~ Vincent Van Gogh,
Do the thing you fear to do
and silence that voice of fear forever.